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khammoun
03 July 2009 @ 04:24 pm
Summer  
There's not much going on this summer.

Im not sure exactly why i keep this journal, since i mostly use this for feedback anyway. Maybe it's because you cant read certain fics unless you're a member... hmmm, yeah, that ws it.

I currently have a raging headache, i think it's from overstressing. my brain is starting to give out. things are pretty mellow where im at, except for the facts that it keeps raining, my personal life is pretty shitty, and people keep losing their lives to this odd thing called coincidence. I hate that thing. it haunts me where ever i go in the form of my ex-boyfriend.

Oh, an update on that: he's an arogent jerk and he thinks he's doing me a favor because he thinks I'll fall in love with him. hmm. I think not. If he got anywhere near me (alone) i would seriously bash his face in with a crowbar. I like crowbars. I think his face could use the improvement.

Good day, so long, Im driving for the first time.
 
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khammoun
26 June 2009 @ 11:10 pm
my ex. a ramble...  
ok so my BF broke up with me about 2 months ago and he's such a dick.
he wont talk to me for some weird reason that I cant fathom and i didnt do anything wrong.
his reason for breaking up was because we were "growing apart." that was about 2 weeks before prom.
he went with one of the biggest "flirts" in school.

I kinda really hate him.

if he would just talk to me, everything would be fine, but i have no closure, so i cant help but stew on it because Im a Cancer, and that's what we do.

Oh, yeah, and since my birthday was on the 24th, he ruined that too, because he has to be the biggest dick and end up RIGHT OUTSIDE MY MOTHER FUCKING HOUSE AT MY PARTY.

I could kill him right now. "Virgil" has gotta die or else. It's only for my mental health, I swear.'


In other news, my new crush (who i almost liked before i started dating "virgil") doesnt like me. he says that he does, but he's too big of a pansy to do anything about it. so it doesnt count because what's the fun in that?

God, i hate boys. I'll stick to slash, thank you very much, since boys obviously cant function properly unless they're fictional characters. :-P


WOOOO!!!! besides the point, i got a new laptop for my birthday so FUCK YES!!! haha, bitches!!!
ok, im done.


pffft, happy motherfuckin birthday to me!!!



ps...i only listen to mcr when i angst... it helps.
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Current Location: bedroom
Current Mood: pissed off
Current Music: my chemical romance
 
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khammoun
26 June 2009 @ 11:08 pm
Writer's Block: Environmental Confession  

'Fess up: What do you do that's bad for the environment?

Sponsored by One Million Acts of Green brought to you by Cisco.


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i take really long showers and leave my cell phone & ipod charger plugged in... :)
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Current Location: bed
Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: my chemical romance-- cemetary drive
 
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khammoun
14 June 2009 @ 01:34 pm
my gym essay yay for the last day of school...  
Chyna Ly June 14, 2009
Gym essay Choice topic A block

Gym Class or Physical Education has changed a lot over the years. Students and teachers have both molded to a changing society, and I’m not sure if it is for the better. Gym is not about writing. The past generation got along just fine without doing “gym essays”. We get enough essays from our core classes, such as English or Social Studies. We even have to do lab reports in Bio class. The only classes that do not require English are Math and Physical Education.

If a student is running and doing what they are supposed to be doing in class, then they should get a great grade. If a student is active in a sport, I don’t think that they should be required to take PE class. One might want to take it for an easy grade, but someone might be able to use that block for something more productive, like a math course or an elective such as art or music. It’s all good and dandy that we are running around and playing sports, but some people just don’t care about that sort of thing.

I guess I’m just tired of writing these gym essays. We get the same topics ever year and it’s very easy to run out of things to write about. I’m not at all interested in the sports world like some people in this school, so I have nothing to write about. I pay more attention to the underground music world. I don’t have a favorite basketball team, but I could give you an entire biography on the members of My Chemical Romance, each and every one of them. There’s no way that I could tell you what is going on at a football game, or the season record for a soccer team, but I could sing you the lyrics of every All-American Reject’s song ever written!! There is nothing interesting about the sports world for me, so I lose all interest in what I’m writing, and therefore, I have no drive to look up information needed to pass. I also have no basis for a possible topic. Marshmallows could be a great topic of choice for me, but not hockey. I just don’t care about sports.

Works Cited:
My own knowledge and opinions
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khammoun
14 June 2009 @ 01:14 pm
homework... my computer doesn't like saving things...  
Chyna Ly
“Dirty Hand and Macbeth Project”
Revision #3

The passages from “The Dirty Hand” and Macbeth both have a common theme of guilt. This theme is central in both works and is present in the entirety of them both. The theme of guilt presents itself in multiple aspects of the passages and creates many connections between the two. Both works use hands as symbols for a character’s conscience and in both passages, the hands are tainted in some way or another. Both characters from each passage want to get rid of their guilt but cannot and therefore are forced to hide their guilt.
In “The Dirty Hand” the character says that he “used to keep it/ out of sight/ in my pocket.” He hid his dirty hand in his pocket in an attempt to hide his guilt. Lady Macbeth, from the Macbeth excerpt, thinks to cover her hands’ stench with “All the perfumes of Arabia,” but she apparently does not think this would work as she continues to say that they, “will not sweeten this little hand.” This wish to eliminate the guilt which is felt is also seen in “The Dirty Hand” as the character expresses his wish to cut off his tainted hand.
The actual guilt on the hands is portrayed differently in both works. In “The Dirty Hand,” guilt is portrayed as “a dull grayish dirt” on the characters hand while in “Macbeth” the guilt is blood on Lady Macbeth’s hands. The visual blood later seems less important as the blood (guilt) is cleaned away (a representation of covering up the guilty deed), however she states, “Here’s the stench of blood still,” showing the guilt continues to linger as an odor. Comparatively the character in “The Dirty Hand” also was incapable of ridding himself of guilt. Regardless of the form, the guilt took into the passages it is clear that both heavily used symbolism to install it.
Both works use imagery to enhance how guilty the characters feel and a first person point of view to make the passages seem more personal. The difference between the two is that in “The Dirty Hand,” the protagonist is more visual with how his guilty hand looks at the moment, (“It is not mud or soot/ or the caked filth/ of an old scab”) while Lady Macbeth describes a stench (“…Here’s the smell of blood still.”) to appeal to the sense of smell. Lady Macbeth goes into depth with the actual events that make her guilty. (“The Thane of Fife had a wife…”) “The Dirty Hand” never states why the protagonist is guilty; it simply uses imagery to advance the point of guilt.
In the “Macbeth” excerpt, Lady Macbeth tells her husband to “give me your hand” which could be interpreted as her taking on not only her own conscience but her husband’s as well. In this sense, “The Dirty Hand” differs from the excerpt in that the protagonist wishes to cut off his hand, guilt, conscience and all, chop it up and throw it away. He then wishes to gain a new hand, or conscience, in my opinion. In both of the characters’ attempts to remove their guilt hyperbole is used often to display the idea, such as “The Dirty Hand’s” portrayal of self mutilation.
It is very ironic that Lady Macbeth would tell her husband not to worry while she’s feeling so guilty that she is smelling blood. She wasn’t even the one to drop the dagger into the King’s chest. Lady Macbeth must have felt responsible for everything her husband had done, especially if she told him to give her his conscience.
Though both characters wish to undo their wrongs, they both understand that nothing can be done about it. “What’s done cannot be undone,” according to Lady Macbeth. The character of “The Dirty Hand” realizes this when he states, “And then I realized/it was the same/if it was used or not/Disgust was the same,” meaning he realized that despite any efforts to hide his guilty hand it would haunt him regardless.
Overall, both passages are about guilt and the character’s need to rid themselves of it. In the end, I do not believe that either person could live with him/herself very long without taking steps to make amends for their deeds. If one can smell blood on one’s hands after all of Arabia’s perfumes have been spritzed upon them, one will need therapy and a cup of hot chocolate to sooth oneself.
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Current Location: dining room
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khammoun
23 May 2009 @ 09:52 am
>:(  

I am soo sick of my life right now, I can't wait for something good to actually happen to me. I am sooo gonna be a rock star, I don't care who you are. >:(
what the hell, why is everything so crappy right now?
I want to go to Japan and see My Chemical Romance at the summer sonic show. That would be epic awesome. But here I am, all the way in the US, rotting away and whine whine whine. :(

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Current Location: My room
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khammoun
23 April 2009 @ 03:27 pm
¡rant!  

I hate this fucking perdicament I am currently squashed in. There is nothing good about it. I should be happy as fuck right now, but it turns out that I do NOT ever want to go through this part of my life again.

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khammoun
13 April 2009 @ 03:51 pm
irony  
I find it ironic that my icon is usually that smile picture, when almost ALL of my entries are moody and bitchy, and maybe just a little bit emo. Yeah. Ironic. Right.

Well, I have an English project to do, so I think I might have to do that before the week is up, which means by Thursday, seeing as how I'm leaving to see the All American Rejects!! Wooo!!

I've just noticed that I am a real bitch when I have nothing to look forward to and when I'm being bitched at. I'm a very fungshue(?) sort of person I guess. Calm creates calm in my life, but when you give me a small dose of humor I expand on it and multiply that type of energy by 100. :)

So, if you are wondering, NO, I am NOT this bitchy and dull in real life. I will crawl into your lap for no reason except that I'm cold and I want your body heat. :)


Nooooowwww....
I want to follow my dream to be a performer. I love being on stage, because I am a ham and I feel extreamly comfortable on stage. I may feel like I have to pee when I first go on, but that feeling leaves after a while.

These are the things that people think that I should be when I grow up:
artist
comic book artist
stage artist
fasion designer
model, as in Model Model, as in I'm too short to consider it
Broadway performer
Rock Star (no, I would not mind that at all :D but I need connections, desperatly...T_T)
Actress, as in Hollywood.

No, I would not mind any of those.
Most people used to say that I should be an artist, but now that I've gone through the musical, people have been saying that I should be an actress or a broadway star. I don't know which one I want to do more, but I now know that I want to follow my dreams and go after one. I just need help figuring out which one I should follow. :P
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Current Location: basher's room
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khammoun
13 April 2009 @ 03:39 pm
siblingsss...  
why are they so hard on your patience?! They must think, Oh, that's my sister, so she'll love me anyway. No. I will not love you if you use and abuse me. >:( I am not a dog.

I will forgive you faster than I would forgive a friend because we live in the same house, but I must say, Enough is Enough.

Why dont people understand that you are not supposed to abuse your family? Why do people think that they can be bitchy to their brothers and sisters like they're second class citizens??

No more. Family is family. Be happy you have one and stop treating your FAMILY LIKE IT IS DIRT. We probably care more about you than any of your friends, and if that is not so, then your friends are your family.

I don't even know where this rant came from, but I am SO sick of my sister being bitchy just because she has her period. it's stupid. And I know, when people complain about people being bitchy it makes them look like hypocrites, but that is not the case. There was something to trigger the complaining, as when someone being BItchy JUST DOES'T HAVE A REASON.
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Current Location: ashley's room
Current Mood: pissed off
Current Music: well, it WAS 30sec2mars, but w/e.
 
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khammoun
13 April 2009 @ 12:26 pm
(no subject)  
I Sometimes wonder how many people have my picture saved onto their computer. I'm pretty careless about what I put on my personal sites, so that could be an issue. People usually never ask me when they put up a picture of me.

It's really gonna suck when a potential employer does a background check and finds that I'm a nut case who reads fan fiction and finds a picture of my teenaged self clad in a bakini, climbing on my friends and trying to play guitar hero at the same time. :I hmm. This could be an issue. I need to stop doing all this blogging and complaining and whatever. This really isn't all that anonymous. LOL I can't even spell right!!! XD go ahead, find my spelling errors. I blame everything on my iPod's spell checker!!

Now, I have to wonder. Why would someone have my picture on their computer? I'm not overly pretty, I don't have a sexy body (I have a fasion friendly body, thankyouverymuch) and I'm not famous, as far as I know. Who knows, I could have a small cult following in Thailand slowly saving money to visit me in America, BUT I WOULDNT KNOW!! :P no one has said anything to me about it. :I

I need to start doing crunches. My abs are sort of turning into one big muscle..
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Current Location: bed
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Current Music: Aar
 
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khammoun
13 April 2009 @ 11:47 am
Writer's Block: Sweet Tooth  

What is your favorite holiday-specific candy or treat?


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I have got to say that the Easter egg shaped resees cups are my total favorite. They must put something in those eggs, because they taste ten times better than normal resees cups.
:( I havnt had a single one this year...
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Current Location: Living room
Current Mood: lazy
Current Music: All American rejects
 
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khammoun
12 April 2009 @ 10:20 pm
Millie? What about mrs meers?!  

Oooh, and the musical was quite the hit. I feel like a celeb, people keep talking to me and saying how great I was, and how I was probably the only one who could play Mrs Meers...

I'm not sure that that last one was much of a compliment... :)

Anyway, that's just the joy of a small town. :) everyone knows everyone's junk and even off you didn't see the production of millie, you are still advised to dish the compliments if you manage to remember who was supposed to be in the show, and who didn't bomb.

Hmm. Not that I'm going to complane. But I'm getting a big head. I can physically feel it expanding. Not the best thing in the world. Once I get out there in the world, I'm gonna fall so hard, I effing won't even know what HIT me. :( w/e I'm gonna enjoy my little scrap of fame while I can :)

Yeah. :) I'm such a villan. I play it so well too. My poor sister. :) she must sleep with one eye open. ;)

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khammoun
12 April 2009 @ 10:12 pm
Paris...  

If you've been stalkin me for a while you would know that my boyfriend is currently in Paris right now. He left a couple days ago, on Friday actually, and my first contact with him is him telling me that he went to see the eiffel tower, went on a boat ride, and managed to get into a BRAWL.

A MOTHERFUCKING BRAWL. That was his exact word, too. Brawl. He's sooooo.... I don't even know what word I'm looking for. He went on this amazing trip to Paris, ducking PARIS, for SOCCER, and he gets into a fist fight. I was worried sick that his plane crashed, that he got fucking.... I don't even know but my thought were founded!! Yeah!! Fist fights... Maybe it wasn't him who got into the fight, but he is a little hot headed, and the French dont like Americans, so... Taunting... But they got DQed from the tournement they went there for... I feel as though that has happened before... 0_- probably because it has...

Whatever. He didn't say that he broke his nose or whatever, so I'm not gonna stress. But he is in fact, in enemy territory. :( hot grounds, there. But then again, the French really don't like much.... Sorry, but if you're French, you probably don't like me right now anyway. I'm worried about my muffin... :( and he doesn't even like it when I call him that. I'm worried about miss "Elizabeth" too. She's probably living it up right now, but I'm scared that she's flipping out. :I

I'm just a great big worry wart right now...
I want to actually talk to him...

Happy Easter, all!! C: that's my fake smile...
AAAAAAAH!!! I'm going to see the all American rejects!!! :D that's the biggest news of all, and I neglect it. Tiskktiskk...
But it sucks, because "Virgil" is comming home on thursday, and... I leave to go stay at my buddy's home so I can get to the concert on time, among other things, but I probably won't see him... :((
Boooooo....

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Current Location: On ashley's bed
Current Mood: Worried
Current Music: All american rejects-- the wind blows
 
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khammoun
10 April 2009 @ 01:39 pm
emoticons  
YeAH!!! new emoticons! and they're all of... me... ewww... w/e, at least they're acurate. :)

k, well, off to shower and go to Tay Tay's house!! :D
I dont have a clue how to talk to that kid... :P
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Current Location: ashleys room
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Current Music: idk your own disaster
 
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khammoun
10 April 2009 @ 11:23 am
Writer's Block: Get Real  

What reality show would you most want to be a contestant on? What would your strategy for winning be?


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man, I would soooo be on American Idol. I would just be effing awesome. I might lay low at the beginning, but then aroung top 10 I would just effing bust out and kill it. as in kill it, I mean be the best for the rest of the comp. but then I would totally suck around the top 4 or 3 so they would vote me off so they don't ruin me. :)

Honestly, I think that that's Adam's strategy right now. It's not the 4th or 3rd round yet, but we'll see. ;)
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Current Location: ashley's room
Current Mood: blank
Current Music: stronger, better, faster, stronger. kanye west. 0_o wtf
 
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khammoun
28 March 2009 @ 11:15 pm
School fics, please?  

To introduce myself, I am an old lurker, I've been on here for a while. Some of you have been subject to my usually enthusiastic comments, though I'm not a writer.
I prefer giving comments. :)

None of the stories on my refresh list seem to want to refresh, so I was wondering if anyone had any great school fics? Around the HBP era is great, and I'm looking for those budding romance fics. You know, the "I like him, but does he like me?" or the "since when was I into blokes?!" fics. Crazy obsession that is actually a crush?
For example, I liked "it starts with a spin" on Hex Files, I can't remember the author for the life of me...

I just thought I'd hit you all up, seeing as how this is the best place to find great quality fics.(IMHO)

Thank you in advance!!!
Xoxockly

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khammoun
28 March 2009 @ 10:38 pm
Twitter  

I've just flooded the fuck out of twitter. I'm not sure how I feel about this, but I do feel more confident in my iPod touch typing skills. It takes a certain amount of restraint in order to type on this devise.

I'm just throwing this out there fire the sake of throwing it, but has anyone ever really decided on the pirates, ninjas; werewolves, vampires, buisness? I know that I havnt.

I need something to read so I can go to sleep.

And if someone would be so kind as to tell me what I should go to school for, then I will love you till the end of time...
My future is a fog, but I know that I'll be famous. Don't ask me how, but I have a feeling. Maybe a rock star, actress, broadway singer, artist, I don't know, but the stars have a plan for me. I just have to figure out what that plan is.

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khammoun
28 March 2009 @ 04:19 pm
No updates for me...  

It seems that none of my stories that I have been following are being updated. The authors must all be getting worked to death. This is all very odd, because they're all authors who usually update constantly. Some of them haven't updated in months, which is just annoying, in my opinion. :(
I really don't feel like starting another story, so I'm stuck with nothing to read.
Maybe I should start drawing again, or start one of those books I'm supposed to be reading for my Honors English class... Naw, I don't feel like it..

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khammoun
28 March 2009 @ 04:14 pm
The musical  

Oooh, so I'm Mrs Meers in Modern Millie. That meens that I'm the bad guy. :) I'm a little ticked because I have a major cough and I've been doing so well for so long. The sickness has just undone all my weeks of prep. Well, not all of it, but quite a bit.
I'm coughing in the middle of my songs, so my director's all like, "don't practice your songs, just rest your voice." she must not know me too well, because I'm a very loud type of person.
I have got to get better soon...

did you guys see Adam Lambert kill it on American Idol?
He's my freakin hero. :)
He's major types of pretty, too.

Hmm. I get to go bowling for gym tomorrow. How fun. That means I have to deal with 2 classes worth if snotty girls that I do not want to be around and 3 classes of stupid boys who get into fights about me. No, not for me. about me.

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khammoun
04 March 2009 @ 10:42 pm
Devious Journal Entry  


Gerard Way Sketch by ~khammoun on deviantART

love it.  I dare you.
and seriously, I have myself...

"This is killing me.
I hate school.
I seiously hope that this is the last year that my life will be like this.  I've been absolutly happy, or content with my life until the start of this new semester.  I HATE SCHOOL...  I'm so tired, I can't think straight.  I can't do my homework, which is why I'm on here updating right now.  I can't read my book for English class, but I can read anything on the internet.  I only want to sleep, but I can't.  I'm so tired... the only thing that I ever look forward to is musical practice, which can be a real bore, and the weekend, which just stresses me out anyway, because I know I'm going to have to go back to school and I didn't do any of the homework my teachers thought would be a great idea to dump on me.
I feel like quitting.  I know I can't.
I need to learn how to relax and get my work done at the same time, but I don't know how.
maybe it's just this week.  That's what I think over and over again.  it's been more than a month since the start of the new semester, and I have not calmed down at all.  It just keeps getting worse...
I suck at trig.  actually, I suck at algebra, which in turn kills my trig.
I fail at essays.  I always end up here when I have to do one.  I have essays almost every other night.
Health kills me, because me and my sister sit there with bug eyes, glancing at one another, because we hear our teacher talking about stress and depression, and WOAH!!! she just described our lives.  It pisses me off because I know I don't have f*cking time to get help for it without digging myself into a f*cking bigger hole.

If anyone I know personally sees this, you sure as day better not tell me to do something about it, because I will laugh at you, hold back my tears, then fume about it for the rest of the day.  Don't ruin my day.  I can't handle that crap right now.

I wish I was somewhere else.  I want to go to Paris and see everything beautiful.


Shit... I just watched some little 15 year old Phillipino belt out Celine Dione just like she's one of the best of them.
I want to be a friggen prodegi, or however you spell the word...!
...I probably could be one if I tried harder and ignored everything else...
But I can't, because I'm too much of a type A personality when it comes to some things like grades.

I would draw.  I would make music.  I would act on stage, on Broadway!!!

I have such fragile, amazing, huge dreams that I want to acomplish.

I wish Oprah would come discover me and tell the world that I'm awesome.

I want to be everything.

A model, singer, actress, performer, painter, composer, artist, writer.

I Want to be Everything Impractical.


I want to be impractical.
I want to be a star..."


OK so now that I'm done being all emo, and I have actually done some of my homework, I am going to swoon over Josh Groban and die a sad death.

I really do want to be famous.  I think it would rock SO hard.  I don't really want that sort of lifestyle, I just want people to know who I am, and I want to go down in history, or something like that.
Am I such a bad person that I must express my feelings of self-fulfillment?  I just want to be remembered.  As it would seem, I have a spark for the stage and people remember my name because it isn't all that normal and it's easy to remember. :)  something like "Jane" is too easy to forget.  how about naming your daughter after a country?  maybe something promising like Japan?  Japan doesn't come up in everydy conversations and the only bad thing you can say about them is that they bombed Pearl Harbor and they sided with the Nazis.  Booo.  Booo, Japan.
Just don't name your kid something like Spain.  That would just suck to have a name like Spain.
(No offence to my rents, but Chyna's a little... porny.  but hey, it's a name.)


OMG, the GAME IS OVER!!!  they made the Queen of England lose the game!!!  I was so happy when I found out. :)  who else plays (played!) the game??  (if you did, you'll know what I'm talking about)

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Current Location: my purple circle chair in my room
Current Mood: crappy
Current Music: ...was JoshGroban
 
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